she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize