thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Randomize
