how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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