i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
