yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize