How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
