I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
