you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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