How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
