Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
