Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Randomize
