The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
