This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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