Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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