so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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