She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
