We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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