Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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