Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize