if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
