1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
