Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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