He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
