i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
