the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize
