Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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