heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
