Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
