wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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