Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I have already put on my inside pants.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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