The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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