I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
