woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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