I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Randomize
