Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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