Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
