If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
