Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
