Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
