I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
