i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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