plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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