summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
babies were throwing up all over the place
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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