he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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