You really coming over, don't trick.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
