There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
