I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
