drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
