New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize