elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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