I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
